Monday, March 13, 2006

Doog Countdown: 5 More Sleeps

Monday, March 13, 2006
I really hate to disappoint, but it appears that I have no regularily-scheduled Sunday Rant. Usually, I'd have something related to the unrealistic expecations of beauty placed on women and equally unrealistic body types, spurred by Grey's Anatomy. Or, I'd have been scorned/shamed/insulted at some point over the weekend and felt the need to complain. I hate to say it, but I'm just not up to airing my dirty laundry today. I mean, yes- over the course of the past few days, I've been rejected, neglected, ignored, excluded, mocked, demeaned, and undermined- but I've also been congratulated, applauded, thanked, complimented, awarded, and appreciated.

I mean, as long as there's a balance, right?

Besides, I don't know how I could possibly rant after spending most of the weekend in my new lime-green plastic shoes.

Alright. We do have room for a minor rant.

Dear Past:

Why won't you just stay where you are?! I mean, for the love of lawnchairs! My own cousin had to buy me a book called "How To Dump A Guy", and trust me, there is no chapter about what happens when said dumped guy comes flinging back into the picture. I can tell you, Oh Dumped Guy, be're not going to be around for long. I've got a lot to say, and not a lot of it is nice. I don't have time to be nice...I'm too busy trying to find a job.

At any rate, my blog now has as many posts as the United States has...well, states.


backstagebetty said...

What happend to all the holes that dumped guys are supposed to fall in?
I say we dig some more, there's clearly a hole shortage.

Erin said...

I agree there is definitely a hole shortage! If people can dig holes to China, we can surely dig a hole big enough for that annoying ex to fall into.

Meg said...

Anyone know anyone with a backhoe? Oil Rig Drill? Large Shovel?

RostockRose said...

First it was KY in tunnels, now its digging holes to stuff your exes in. I'm beginning to wonder about the "sub"text of this blog.


Carmabelle said...

Hey ladies!
Back in October when I was trying to get rid of some confidential documents for work, I found out that for the low low price of 25 dollars the City of Saskatoon ladfill will dig you a hole to put whatever you want in there. Talk about a deal!
Although it would be easier to bury the exes, wouldn't it be more fun to bury all the girls who are prettier than us and watch our exes have to stoop to someone inevitably less cool/pretty/smart/fantastic than us? Maybe I'm a sadist...but I think their suffering is far more entertaining than watching them try to dig their way out of a hole.

Caitlin said...

Lime green shoes?! wOOt!