Tuesday, January 01, 2008

I Lied

Tuesday, January 01, 2008
I'm sorry. There will be no "Best of 2007" high-lights reel. I've got neither the patience nore the narcissistic inclination to go through hundreds of crappy blog posts to find a few far-between gems. Besides, I'm sure the things that you got a kick out of are far different from the ones that meant the most to me when I wrote them.

I should just write that frigging Great Canadian Novel and get it over with.

Anyway, things that are mildly irritating me as I reach the final hour of my Winter Festivus Vacation:

1. How could someone POSSIBLY not understand sarcasm? Someone under 35, over the age of 13, and of sound mind? I don't understand.

2. What's the point of going back to work on a Wednesday, anyway? I might as well have just gone in today. Did I accomplish anything on my random mid-week day off work? Nein. Niet. No. Because all the stores and most of the Starbucks were closed, so errand running was minimal and productivity was low.

3. Is there even a point anymore? I get up, I drink a lot of coffee, I work, I come home, I read crappy internet content, I drink more coffee, I go to sleep. Welcome, Welcome, 2008, to the land of moderately anxious existential bullshit, also known as my quarter-life crisis.

4. I hope my landlady renegs on that 'no cat' policy, because it's awful damn hard to become a crazy, dying-alone cat lady when you are prohibited from fostering felines.

5. Really?! I haven't worn pants of the dress variety since the 20th of December. This is unfair. I should get the rest of the week off, just because I'm cute. Or because I'm really annoying and hard to work with when I'm in a pissy mood.

6. One should not watch "Under the Tuscan Sun" during a time when it's socially acceptable and encouraged to look back, reflect, and vow to make changes to your life. I can't afford a villa in Tuscany. Le sigh, my life, it is unfair. Also, why are there so many good lookings in that movie?! I hate you, Diane Lane. A LOT.


PatZ said...

the solution to number 4 is a taxidermist.

Meg said...

That might be the solution to number 1, too.

K Johnson said...

The solution to #4 is obviously coming over to my house on a regular basis to visit Crock and Onyx. They would love to get affection from Auntie M.