Friday, May 30, 2008

Why you gotta be that way?

Friday, May 30, 2008
Dear printer,

Work, damn you!

Hugs and kisses,


Dear noggin,

Look, I know you're upset about this whole cranial slimming regime I've got going on, but let's face facts. You protesting by providing me with a skull-splitting headache for the last 12 hours? Not helping your cause.

Are you not aware of the rules? Have headache, take advil, go to sleep, wake up headache free. That's how it works.

Unimpressedly yours,


Dear Advil Extra Strength Ultra Fast Acting Migraine Relief Liquid Caps,

I love you, I love you, I love you, please work faster.

Eternally indebted to you,