Friday, December 31, 2010

Five Years of Blogging

Friday, December 31, 2010
Wow. I missed my five year blogiversary yesterday.

I remember when I started this blog. It came on the heels of another, long-forgotten blog, where I attempted to bitch anonymously about people in my life I liked or didn't like, as the case may be. Then someone asked me if I knew what a blog was and if I had one, and I promptly deleted old blog (god forbid people know what stupidity I was capable of late at night after several whatever-I-drank-in-2005s!) and started this baby.

And here we are.

In December of 2005, I was a tired University student. I sat on the couch in my parents' house, wearing a yellow bathrobe, eating corn pops and generally feeling sorry for myself. I was convinced that no one would ever love me, no one really liked me anyway, and that I'd never find a job. But I put on a brave front and carried on and sure enough. I found that I was wrong.

In December 2010, I'm a tired Arts Administrator. I'm sitting at my boyfriend fiance's computer desk in fleece reindeer pants, drinking coffee and generally feeling shocked that half a decade has passed in the blink of an eye. I found someone who loves me, and someone I love, and lo! It's even the same person. But I learned that love isn't a magical band-aid. It doesn't fix everything. I have friends - not as many as I'd like to have, not as many as I had in 2005, but I wouldn't trade them for the world. I've found many jobs. I've lost a couple of them. I'm working on not letting what I do for a living determine what I do with my life - even if what I do for a living is pretty rad. And I continue to put on a brave front, despite some really shitty internal monologue some of the time, and carry on.

Maybe this year I'll figure it all out and it'll be magical, but I somehow doubt it. What it will be is another year that I'm blessed with. Fingers crossed, anyway.

My goal this year is to still be employed in the same place on January 1, 2012.

My other goal is to be happier. Find happiness. Make happiness. Work on my attitude and my perspective. I have so many reasons to be happy. I'm going to work on creating things to look forward to, things to work towards.

Obviously one of those things is marrying Gary, and while I am not BURSTING with excitement, as some people have remarked on, I am quietly and consistently simmering with joy on the back burner! We're planning to be engaged for 18 months or so - that's a long time to BURST WITH EXCITEMENT! I'm sure I'll get there.

And finally, in 2011, I'm going to actually DO IT, not just think about it and talk about it and obsess about it. Whatever that IT is.

Happy New Year. Thanks for reading.

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

whooops

Wednesday, December 29, 2010
nothing to see here. I posted on the wrong blog there for a second.

*whistles casually*

Monday, December 27, 2010

every single thing

Monday, December 27, 2010
Either my parents are really, super ecstatic that they've finally managed to convince someone to marry me, or they just are wicked awesome, or both. I somehow managed to receive every single item on my Christmas wishlist.

Except for the diamond stud earrings, but to be honest, I didn't actually write that down anywhere, I just sort of aimlessly hinted by quoting the Spence Diamond commercials for a few weeks hoping it would get my message across.

But if I got everything else on my list, you know what that means.

That's right. In addition to black socks, green placemats, a trivet, a wristwatch and that Mad Men book, a few mean rounds of trivial pursuit, Magi's Turban cookies and an hour-long singalong...

On Christmas morning, my Dad nearly killed me by hoisting a 25 pound KitchenAid mixer on my lap.

I'm so incredibly spoiled.

Friday, December 24, 2010

On Baby, it's Cold Outside and Date Rape

Friday, December 24, 2010
Baby, it's Cold Outside is one of my favourite Christmas songs. I love tracking down different versions. It's got a vintage, tongue-in-cheek sass that I just love.

But on more than one occasion this year, I've seen blog comments, tweets and posts from people who don't like it because they think it's about date rape.

Okay, fair enough. I can see how one could come to that conclusion. Dude pleads with his lady to stick around, plys her with booze, some implied hair-messing takes place. Obviously, if she doesn't go home right now, one thing will lead to another.

But really.

Who hasn't been out with or over at someone's place and not wanted to leave? And then put on that whole, 'Oh, but I should really go' (BEDROOM EYES SAY I REALLY WANT TO STAY) gig? Particularly around Christmas, when we're all drinking just a little bit more than usual and in all kinds of crazy romantic wistful nostalgic moods?

Maybe I'm naive, maybe it's my prairie sensibilities that somewhere inside say, 'Lady, it's dark, probably -40, there are weirdos out there in the streets, if you're walking your Maiden Aunt would probably prefer you to stay inside where it's safe anyway!'

Maybe it's the fact that I don't want to make awful, nasty connections with one of my favourite Christmassy things. I'm kind of protective of my personal Christmas traditions and favourites. But I don't buy it. In any other instance, I'd probably say yeah, consent was certainly not given...but Baby. It's bad out there.

Thursday, December 23, 2010

Oh, the things she could bake!

Thursday, December 23, 2010
Oh the pizzas, the cookies,
The flatbreads and cakes

The wonderful, tastyful, things she could bake!

Delecate biscuits and cinnamon buns
Adding dry to the wet while the mixer still runs!
The dough hook would work, no reason to knead
The shiny appliance - a trusty cookery steed.

The appliance is heavy, the countertop small
and her hips would regret it if she ate it all..

Marshmallows, mereingue, sturdy cheesecake -
But oh! The wonderful, tastyful, things she could bake!

Fresh bread, mashed potatoes, pastry shaped like a braid...

If only Megan had her very own KitchenAid.

Thursday, December 09, 2010

Her heart grew three sizes that day

Thursday, December 09, 2010
I can't believe I'm going to admit this. And that I'm going to go all post-epiphany Grinch on you, but here it is.

I haven't always loved Christmas. Usually I'm so burned out, working in an industry where the FAMILY HOLIDAY SHOW/PRODUCTION/ETC is a really big project (read: opportunity to earn enough cash to pay for the rest of the more ambitious 'high art' projects of the year) and the pressure is high.

Last year come December 24, I swear to god, I was going to kill anyone who danced anywhere near my head with sugarplum.

This year we're dark at Christmas. That means no show. Which means not a lull, necessarily, but definitely a pause to gather our professional thoughts and get things ready to go for our January 6th gallery opening. My urge to drink a lot is pretty much minimal. It's nice. My liver rejoices.

What I have always loved about Christmas, despite angsty years of exams/work insecurity/overwork/low incomes is the presents. I'm a material person. I show love through receiving gifts.

I have always looked forward to what was in the packages. For me. Yes, I love giving gifts and shopping for gifts and generosity etc, but I really love getting presents.

This year, I put tea towels and a cutting board on my Christmas list. (AND A KITCHENAID MIXER HINT HINT HINT) I was stumped, frankly. I appear to have, in fact, everything I want. And need. Except a KitchenAid mixer, but really, I know that's out of the budget so I'll not be disappointed when I don't get one. I promise.

This year I'm really looking forward to Christmas, but the packages, ribbons, bows, festival of gifts bit is totally in the background.

I am looking forward to kicking back with my family. Enjoying a glass of wine or rum. Many many belly laughs. Some kisses in the snow. Good food. And relaxing.

Monday, December 06, 2010

How to have friends over for dinner without really trying

Monday, December 06, 2010
1. Text friend at 3:00 pm inviting him over for dinner at 6:00 pm. Decide there is enough of what you were already planning to make to feed one more person and stop worrying.
 
2. Rejoice over the fact that your awesome boyfriend, er, fiance, er, life partner cleaned the kitchen the day before while you gossiped with a girlfriend at her house. Take short nap.
 
3. Wipe down counters. Make cookie dough. Freeze half so you don't eat 54 cookies after dinner. Preheat oven to cookie temperature.
 
4. Put pre-packaged 'fresh' pasta into pyrex dish. This is key. Do not bake it in the packaging even though it says you can. Have at least a little class. Cover with jarred pasta sauce and *bonus* shredded mozzarella. Cover with foil.
 
5. Sit down and relax. 10 minutes before guest is to arrive, throw bagged salad into bowl. Add some fruit and some nuts you found in the cupboard. Put in fridge. Put cookies into oven.
 
6. Welcome guest who brought wine. Congratulations, your house smells like delicious cookies. How welcoming. Take cookies out of oven. Put pasta in oven. Make oil and vinegar dressing for salad. Drink one bottle of wine. Eat.
 
7. Relax. Drink second bottle of wine. Be pleased with yourself for passing off prepackaged food as home cooking. It's not like he was going to make anything better on his own, anyway.